TEDDY BEAR

When I found you in the attic you were threadbare.
On closer inspection it seemed you'd shrunk.

But the smile on your face remained as I remembered it -
like an old soldier's moustache.

Your breath smelled of dust and years of neglect
and one of your poor eyes had drooped.

Oh how I wanted to hug you,
to resume our exclusive closeness

that once soothed me in the dead of night
when vile nightmares tried to claim me

and left me feeling so alone and scared...
but I was afraid of what I'd feel.

Then I probed the archives of your heart
and there discovered a little blonde girl

lovingly cuddling her teddy bear, her Soul-Mate.
Suddenly, my world turned upside down

as, engulfed in aching nostalgia,
I clutched you close to my heart.

ADRIAN

In your eyes there is an emptiness, an absence
of years, of time to fulfil
all those expectations: a beloved eldest son
upon whom all family ambitions rested, confined now to a fading likeness
that hangs between trees in the garden of Castle Drogo.

Oh that beautiful face, cursed with such
grim aura of profound tragedy.
The pointlessness of it. I look at you
and sense no future, just a dismal premonition of things to come.
And I can bear to look no longer

in case I experience through you too vividly
that fateful day in Ypres, nineteen-seventeen, when
all around you the skulls rose up in blood-soaked mud
of blasted trenches...and that ghastly hush that followed
with the sudden horrific realisation

that your smile had expanded to encompass
Creation's endless entirety,
and you'd lost yourself somewhere in agony
between the brilliance of the poppies and explosive shell-fire.
And how the young Major wept inwardly then for his wife;

for the offspring he would never sire;
for his parents' and siblings' grief;
for the homeland he would never again see...
and for those who were left to gather up the pieces
and lay them to rest in Vlamertinghe New Military Cemetery...


In Memoriam,  Adrian Drewe.   1891 - 1917



Just a flying visit, guys...to send you my heart-felt thanks for all your kind messages of support. I can't begin to express how much they mean to me at a time like this. I will reply to each one as soon as I possibly can.
There have been many scares: the op was over, then he had a massive arterial bleed so had to be rushed back to theatre and opened up again.
He just began to come round from the anaesthetic, then his kidneys began to fail. They managed to rectify that, only for his breathing to deteriorate.
At the moment he is stable though, in intensive care.
So we are hoping and praying...

I am missing you all so much. As soon as I can I will visit you all, I promise.

The above post was written a month ago, for Remembrance Day.
I hope you like it...

And thank you again for all your support. You have all been so kind that it brings tears to my eyes.
Bless you all...