Followers

Thursday 21 February 2019

ALTER EGO

Inward lurch of the stomach, as though
I've accidentally slipped from a precipice.
Such biting utterances. Surely
                                      that wasn't my voice, was it?
Because
       I could never be that harsh!



Disbelief, combined with intense embarrassment. Choking
on those words, cursing the very notion of retaliation.
Rumour: it must have been someone else -
someone touchy and aggressive, not like me at all.
                                    But I am betrayed by my own face.



In the mirror I see her -
that spiteful, scowling harridan
who sometimes takes control, while all
I can do is watch and listen to her scathing utterances
until her stream of vitriol is spent.



Then I
         am left with her unpalatable legacy:
a huge helping of humble pie. 😉



21 comments:

  1. Very insightful. Do we not all slip into this other voice from time to time, and then regret?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes I guess we all do sometimes.
      I always feel so bad afterwards, though...for ages.
      Many thanks, Anthony.

      Delete
  2. How better to convey it than by looking in the mirror?
    Lately, I have been this one more than I would like to admit. However, I know the persona is here only temporarily; to show me the way becoming better and adjusting to the shift.
    Thank you for permitting me to understand I am not alone.
    xxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So good to know I'm not alone either, Dale...so thank you so much!😊😊 xxx

      Delete
  3. Ah yes, the truth can be seen in the mirror. I, too, an overtaken by the scowling harridan, even moreso now that life seems to be once again changing for me, and as I struggle to accept and let go, I tend to become a bit too shrewish with my loved ones. Then, I sit around and feel sad about the things I may have said.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My sentiments exactly, Mary!
      It is the changes and challenges in life that seem to set off these little outbursts, isn't it?!
      Thank you so much for understanding...😊😊

      Delete
  4. So human of her...and of me.
    I do not like the shrew that I can be...but do I dare not let go of her when she is about to explode or do I restrain her and suffer from pent-up emotions~

    Oh how I love your writings my talented friend! You are amazing!!!

    Big Hugs and Much Love ❤❤❤

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ...and of me!
      Yes, such a delicate balance...that is so easily tipped over into harsh words.
      Dearest Jan, my heartfelt thanks.😊😊

      All my love and hugs ❤❤❤

      Delete
  5. This is only human, and sometimes we need to let go, or should that be let rip and as Jan above says 'explode'.

    Love your words here Ygraine, put together so well.

    Have a happy Friday and a good weekend too.

    All the best Jan

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, I suppose only human...but I always suffer SUCH remorse...🙁
      Thank you so much, Jan.

      Wishing you a fabulous weekend too!😊😊

      Delete
  6. very POWERFUL expression dearest Ygraine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    how incredibly skilled you are paint thoughts and feeling so BRILLIANTLY!!!!!!!!!!!

    i keep looking at her eyes until she disappear defeated by my smile .

    she is less of me which is satisfaction , how can i let her ruin more of me which is cherished and empowered with FAITH AND HOPE !

    hugs and kiss to your forehead my precious friend!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh I do wish people wouldn't insult me, dearest Baili...maybe then I wouldn't have these occasional indignant outbursts!
      Ah, but, am I now blaming someone else for my own reaction?
      That is down to me alone.
      I can choose how I react. And surely the best way is to ignore the insult and refuse to let it get inside my head? Otherwise, I am being as negative as the person who upset me in the first place!
      Must say over and over in my head "I will not respond to negativity!"
      There...I feel much better now!! *smiles*

      Thank you so much, dear Friend!

      Lots of love and hugs ❤❤❤

      Delete
  7. Oh, wow, confronting our self, are we? :-) That was a very powerful poem. Thanks.

    Greetings from London.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Ha, yes, guess I am! Lol
    When I respond to insults, I tend to "have a right old go" at the person who upset me while looking in the mirror and imagining that person is there!!
    Although I can't always contain myself that long, and then the Dragon breathes fire!! Lol
    I blame it in my Aries temperament!!😉
    Many thanks, CiL.

    Greetings from (a very sunny) Hampshire!😊😊

    ReplyDelete
  9. So true, I understand! We all do things. Never feel bad. This happens in life! Great, powerful write Ygraine! Big Hugs!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Such a relief to know I'm not the only one!😉
      Thank you so much, Sweetie!!

      Have a fabulous day!😊

      Lots of love and hugs ❤❤❤

      Delete
  10. It's been too long since I stopped by. I can really relate to this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can't begin to tell you how good it is to hear from you again, Sandy...thank you so much for your visit!😊 It seems I'm not alone in exploding sometimes then...such a relief!! Lol 😉 xxx

      Delete
  11. We've all been there. Well said my friend.😊

    Hope you're having a good week so far.
    Lots of hugs💟🌸😂

    ReplyDelete
  12. *smiles* only not too often, we hope!! Lol
    Thank you so much, Geraldine!😊😊

    Yes, thank you, a pretty good week so far. Do hope yours has been good too.

    Lots of love and hugs ❤❤❤

    ReplyDelete
  13. Lately, I have been this one more than I would like to admit. However, I know the persona is here only temporarily; to show me the way becoming better and adjusting to the shift. shawl , silver shawl , gold shawl , navy shawl , woolen shawl , evening shawl , silk shawl , bridal shawl , ladies shawl , chiffon shawl

    ReplyDelete

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