A 90's RAVER at 3am

An abandoned warehouse, beat deafening, coloured lights flashing,

her brain in overdrive.

Departing in her lycra gear, utterly bushed

from eight hours of non-stop raving. Outside

the street lamps are unsteady, dancing crazily.

The sidewalk rolls and ripples beneath her feet.

As usual, she throws up: curry, wine,

and a hash of cocktails slapped on the asphalt.

Why is she leaving alone again? Tears well up.

Tonight, she'd hoped, someone would be her rock.

In the taxi, inching through

the still busy streets of Chelsea,

a torrent of thoughts, mostly unwelcome.

Rebellion takes over.

This is her life!

Eighteen is an age for fun, not for hard work -

that can come later. Much later.

Her parents are wrong.

She is not accountant material.

It really is time she left home.

That place has become a tomb. Suffocating.

She is interred in it, feels like the living dead, yet

fear of the unknown seriously holds her back.

Such a dilemma! Hard boozing

has become her ally.

It delays the the inevitable, makes life easier to endure.

How she envies her brother,

a successful artist, living his life his way

with no strings attached -

in total freedom and with no pressure to prove himself.

How wonderful to be free of parental domination

and be left alone to make his own choices!

She, on the other hand, is made to feel beholden:

the dutiful daughter, expected to follow

in Daddy's footsteps - someone to proudly parade

before envious colleagues. His carbon copy.

But, this morning, there is change in the air.

Today, she will begin

the life she has always longed for.

Today, she will tell them exactly how she feels.

The taxi draws to a halt. The house is lit up

and she's aware they're waiting up. As usual!

Today, she won't accept the lecture with downcast eyes.

The alcohol in her blood empowering her,

she enters by the front door. Their faces

forewarn of what is to come.

She's been dominated by control freaks for too long.

Their eyes are flashing with anger. There is no consideration

for her wishes, her feelings. She observes

the hard faces, fuelled by one-upmanship...

                                                                               for the last ever time.

Four more days of holiday, followed by two hospital appointments, then hopefully back to some semblance of normality!😉

Thank you so much for your patience...and your kind support 😊😊