FRIENDSHIP

For A.P.

We have a history, you and I.
It seems aeon's ago
that we first met.
You needed someone to nurture then,
and I to be loved.
But you exceeded that.
Like an alchemist, you transformed
my parents' raw material
into something better,
a person I could finally begin to like.

Since then
you've been my guiding light.
My confidant,
you've absorbed my darker secrets
so I could feel unburdened.
You've been my courage
when I'm afraid,
and defender when I'm threatened.
You've been my husband
and my lover.
You've been the father
of my children,
and my lifeline when
death stole our first-born child.
You've always been there for me
and ready to forgive
cruel acts and harsh words
shouted in anger when I thought
you were trying to control me
and censor my words.
I fought for my freedom then, and won
a Pyrrhic victory,
for without you
I was lost.


When I look at you today
I see our story
etched through time
into lines on your face,
each one betraying a hurt
I carelessly inflicted
throughout our wilderness years.
And when your eyes are downcast
and your mood sombre, I know
those wounds are troubling you.
Bitter regret plagues me then,
and I wish more than anything
that I could reach back through time
to undo my unkindness.
But I can't.
The past is irretrievable,
and even if it weren't
incompatibility would still divide us.
I will forever inadvertently offend you,
and you infuriate me.
That's just the way we are.
Yet, in spite of these monumental differences
I can truly call you friend.

And I love you still.