Friday, 1 March 2013


What lies behind this white front door?
Is it pristine clean, lived-in, in need of refurbishment?

I'm sure it is unique, is exactly what I'm looking for.
As I insert key in lock, I sense it's interior thinking:

Is this the one I'm destined for:
This emotional woman, lacking in stature with too much hair?

And I hesitate, key still in lock.
Is it aware I'm reading it's thoughts?

Could bricks and mortar be my Soulmate?
Get a grip on reality!

But it's aura reaches out, it seems to want me.
And I so want to be wanted by this house.

If I were, I wouldn't mind a bit of dust to clear,
Or a chipped worktop to repair here and there.

My present home is slowly destroying me with toxic memory,
Whereas here, these leaded windows shimmer with hope's promise.

I can picture satin curtains billowing in the breeze,
Ivory, like my ill-fated wedding dress.

And my effigy of Merlyn beside the door.
You see, this house is already almost mine.

So why can I not turn this key?
Have I mistaken wishful thinking for genuine intuition?

That inside, it is mute, hollow, soulless?
At this rate, I'll be standing on this doorstep forever,

Trying to read my future in the woodgrain patterns
Beneath white paint - such a beautiful door!

know why you won't let me in -
You are as afraid as I am!

Afraid I'll tear out your insides,
Change you into something you never wanted to be:

Fill you to capacity with rowdy children, maybe dogs and cats too.
Have no fear, I seek only sanctury inside you.

I will come to you quietly.
Any small changes will be sympathetic, aesthetic.

No crashing, bashing, drilling or banging.
Trust me, I'll keep you much as you are.

Oh if only you knew how this threshold tortures me,
While knowledge of within is already yours.

Humbly, humbly I beg you,
Soothe my anxious mind with certainty

Of our future paths' compatibility.
You are Sun-blessed this morning - surely that

Is your way of smiling - of conveying acceptance of me?
Can you not try to speak my language?

Why must you tease me like this?
There is just one thing I want, and only you can supply it.

It is the absense of voices from the past
That constantly taunt and haunt me from the dead-centre

Of cold walls that witnessed love and lives perish
And fade into history, year after tragic year.

And I have reached breaking point - am
Stress-driven. Destination: premature death.

So please, please Sacred Mother, grant me the courage
To turn this key?

Key clicks the lock open.
For a moment, I hesitate; heart pounding, mouth dry.

The door swings open...
Sun shining through the window

Projects a homely lattice pattern across the hall floor
And I step into my future.



  1. Wow Ygraine...powerful and evocative as always. Your poems always have a beautiful darkness to them.

    1. Many many thanks, keith.
      That is really good to hear!:)

  2. Replies
    1. So happy you enjoyed the poem, Anthony.
      Thank you.:)

  3. And so your house hAunting ends. :)

    And I don't consider you lacking in stature with too much hair.

    1. So kind of you to say so, Gnome!
      Many thanks.:)

  4. Wow, how this resonates! Our son, daughter and both grandchildren are all "on the move" at the moment - or hoping they are! This covers so much ground with such perception and insight. I find it quite amazing. (The word "quite" is not meant to limit "amazing", by the way!)

    1. Haha Thank you Dave, absolutely no offence taken by "quite"!!!
      Really happy you enjoyed reading it.
      And very best of luck to your son, daughter and grandchildren. Here's hoping they all find their perfect homes.:)

  5. We house hunted last year. Seriously, this piece captured everything about our experience, and then some. Well done!

    I gave you a Shout-Out on my blog today. :)

    1. Thank you David.
      Isn't it amazing how we all have so many shared experiences, without ever having met our fellow experiencees!!
      It's really good to know we're not alone during these life-changing moments.

      Many thanks for the Shout-Out too. I so appreciate that.:)

  6. I loved the way you built up the suspense with that key in the door. House-hunting is one of those watershed moments in one's life you never forget so easily. Many thanks.

    Greetings from London.

    1. Thank you so much. I really appreciate your very encouraging comment.
      You're so right. Every house move I've ever made is still etched indelibly in my memory!

      Greetings from a SUNNY Hampshire (such a rare occurrence!!) haha:D

  7. Powerfully gripping..suspenseful..this poem carried me right to the end with anticipation...gorgeous poetry!! I am happy sacred Mother answered you..and opened the door!I too think of my home/space and relate to it as a living being..aware of it's presence and our connection in harmony..very cool to read your thoughts..and that same connection! Beautifully potent imagery throughout this poem...loved it!!
    HUgs and Blessings..

    1. It's amazing how She always seems to be listening when we ask Her help isn't it?
      Thank you so very much for your kind words Victoria. I truly appreciate it.

      Blessings & Hugs

  8. This is absolutely beautiful dear, sometimes we feel that, we feel something will change, other time, other life, when I arrive to this house (in the country side) I think maybe we will have some changes but now I know was a lot of changes!!
    and the kids dont always accept:( well anyway I whish you a love new time! send you love! gloria

    1. Thank you so much Gloria.
      Moving house always involves taking a huge risk, doesn't it?
      But I guess it is a risk that we sometimes need to take if we are to avoid stagnation!
      I really hope your changes were happy ones when you moved to your house in the country!

      Hugs xxx

  9. Hi Ygraine, I interpret this poem as the historical struggle of self; the moment of the divided schism between the past and the present. The friction between the two has triggered the power of the imaginative self to forge ahead to a new future. If only this moment of taking the plunge and unlocking the door of possibilities was kept constantly alive I'm sure the vexatious concerns of the past would vanish into the dustbins of discarded memories - where they probably belong. I love it !

    1. Do you know, William, I find your comment so uplifting!
      I hadn't thought of it this way as I wrote it, but now I see exactly where this poem came from.
      I am going through a time of radical change in my life at present:
      And, yes, I would dearly love to bin certain parts of my past so I can move into my future unfettered!

      I am so grateful for your wisdom. Thank you so so much.:)

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  11. Beautiful symbolism stepping over the threshold into your future! A fabulous write Ygraine, May the sun drenched walls bring you the peace you need. Change is good for the soul. I wish you happiness :)

  12. My heart-felt thanks, Rose. I really mean that.
    Thank you so very much.:)


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I really appreciate hearing your opinions...:)