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Saturday 29 August 2015

PARANOID

Once I had a best friend
I trusted with my life.
How, you're wondering, did it end?
Well now she's my boyfriend's wife.

It's left me increasingly paranoid,
I don't know who to trust.
My faith in others is totally void,
as a broken heart turns to rust.

On a night flight into Heathrow
I'm terrified our plane'll crash land,
or that a terror cell will overthrow
the crew and force our pilot's hand

to take a gun and shoot us all
exactly where we sit,
and in my mind I watch us fall
as one-by-one we're hit.

Oh such relief when we disembark -
then I spy the customs man.
When his sniffer dog begins to bark
it's time for a fast-hatched plan.

For I'm certain he'll plant something on me
to earn himself brownie points.
I wonder what this time it'll be -
a package of ready-rolled joints??

With pounding heart I hurry by,
but it goes without a hitch.
Then I'm convinced I'll surely die
on the back streets of Shoreditch.

For I've heard it said that hereabouts
they'll roll you for a pound,
so if you've any complacent doubts
then just try hanging around!

Phew! I'm finally home and dry...
now I need some chill-out time.
So a local pub I decide to try
where the band plays a decent rhyme.

Well I leave my Bacardi to go to the loo
and when I return to my table
my instinctive mistrust is proved quite true -
honesty's no more than a fable.

My drink's been stolen and there's no one to blame,
it's gone without a trace.
Oh I guess, being female, I'm fair game:
must be written all over my face.

So I decide to leave and while walking home
along a footpath through the woods,
I imagine, when footfalls I hear in the loam,
a gang of murderous hoods.

I begin to run, and the faster I go
the shadows speed up too.
Soon the trees appear to grow
into grotesque monsters who

are clutching at me with bony fingers
as if to tear out my heart.
I'm terror-stricken and the feeling lingers.
It's blowing my mind apart.

Oh these paranoia blues are killing me,
asleep or awake there's no peace.
If only someday I could be free,
I'd pay the Devil's lease.

So tell me please in all honesty:
whose side are you on?
Is your friendship no more than a travesty,
or can you be relied upon?   ;))


36 comments:

  1. WOW!!! My heart was beating faster with every conceived terror that you wrote about!!! Now...I believe that I will go check that my doors and windows are locked tight and secure. That my dog is alert and on the job. That my hubby is near and the cameras are rolling.
    Ah...now I can breath a bit easier. OOPS!!! Forgot to turn on the alarm system and load my gun. Now I'll take a long, deep breath...damn! The fresh air is outside my fortress~

    Great writing, my dear Ygraine :))
    Hugs and Love
    xoxoxo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Now THAT is exactly the spirit I wrote this in! Haha :D
      Thanks for such a brilliantly hilarious comment...I am in stitches...really!!
      You have truly made my day...my dearest friend! :))

      Love & Hugs xoxoxo

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    2. Good!!! I want you to smile whenever you can, dear and lovely, Ygraine~

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  2. I know exactly what u mean, Y... ( I think, we are twin sisters in more than one way ... smiles) ... but I also know that Confucious say: "Old tapes that play ceaselessly in one's head prevent one from from hearing the new music" ... hmmm? ... Love, cat.

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    1. u r awesome ... smiles ...

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    2. ...and I say, Confucious very wise! lol
      I've often wished I could silence some of those old out-worn tapes that continuously play in my head...:/

      Many thanks, my friend! :))

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  3. A very well-phrased catalog of things that go awry. Sometimes I wonder at our ability to navigate adversity. Sometimes I wish we didn't have so many opportunities to test our composure.

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    1. Definitely my wish too, Geo!
      Yes...all these tests...and there we were, believing such things came to an end when we left school!!

      Many thanks.:))

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  4. I was sitting on the edge of my seat reading this, Ygraine! Very powerful.

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  5. I was sitting on the edge of my seat reading this, Ygraine! Very powerful.

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    1. Oh thank you so much, Linda!
      I really appreciate that.:))

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  6. Really amazing Ygraine, really :)

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  7. Really amazing Ygraine, really :)

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  8. Really amazing Ygraine, really :)

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    1. Many thanks, Gloria...you are so kind! :))
      xoxoxo

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  9. __"Y" You've written such a parallel to what we all face each day_! As a contrary, to cause >paranoia to become paranoid< ignore it.
    __Even when we play the game with purity, the (officials) referees cheat.
    __A metaphor_? Politics_?

    trust only
    your sense of warfull days
    each step

    _m

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ah...very wise advice, Doug!
      Who (or what) can we trust on those warfull days...when metaphor rules our every step??
      The politics are treacherous...;)

      Many thanks, my friend.:))

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  10. Enjoyed.. The worries gained through experience, some more real than others..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ...and often...the less real ones are the more worrying...! *smiles*

      Many thanks, Anthony.:))

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    2. ...and often...the less real ones are the more worrying...! *smiles*

      Many thanks, Anthony.:))

      Delete
  11. wow, lots of visuals happening in my mind when I read this. nicely done!

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    1. Thank you so much, Sandy!
      Really happy you enjoyed...:))

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  12. Hola, muy bien escrito..te mando un beso desde Murcia..y espero que comiences bien septiembre...

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  13. Hola, muy bien escrito..te mando un beso desde Murcia..y espero que comiences bien septiembre...

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    Replies
    1. Many thanks, Alp!

      Wishing you a brilliant start to September too...

      A Hug and a Kiss xoxoxo

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  14. Yikes once someone dear stabs you in the heart everything you see is oh so bad and negative, what a write!!!!!

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    1. Yep...thought maybe you'd been there too, Sweetie.
      At least we two haven't suffered alone! *smiles*

      Thank you so much...:)

      Big Hugs xoxoxo

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  15. Hi Ygraine..wowness...potent and riveting.. and such intensity and energy riding throughout the whole piece..like a poetic-rollercoaster!! I love how you said the shadows speed up..that caught my attention..loved that! Yes the sting of betrayal especially from a friend..never a good feeling. Amazing emotional energy and imageries my friend..wowness!! Shine on !
    Wishing you a most magical September ahead!
    Blessings to you Creatrix!!
    V

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    Replies
    1. Oh thank you...my dear, dear friend!
      And that magic is precisely what I need right now, when the future is so uncertain.
      Thank you so much for your kind words...they mean more than you will ever know.:))

      Blessings & Hugs xoxoxo

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  16. __To quickly add... someone once said:
    "All that I write is fiction, even my truisms I list as such,"
    _m

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    Replies
    1. How true of most things in life!
      They never quite turn out as we envisage, do they? ;)

      Many thanks, Doug.:))

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  17. This was a fantabulous read!! Your wit is divine as is your gift of rhyme. Love, love, love it! I'm genuine and true blue, that I can assure you. :) MW

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    1. Oh wow...many thanks, "MW"...your brilliant comment really made my day!!
      And, being genuine, you are definitely one-in-many-million...:))

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  18. Hello dear Ygraine,
    What a story..!! I could believe you would be paranoid and never trust people and friends again.
    But there are many people who really have their heart in the right place and you can definitely trust. Let's hope you can quickly find such a person.

    Big kiss, Marco

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    Replies
    1. My heart-felt thanks for your wonderful comment, Marco...I so appreciate it.
      This poem was based on a phase I went through some years ago. Following the breakup of a close relationship, I found it virtually impossible to trust anyone or anything for some time...in retrospect, I guess it was just a temporary loss of confidence, but at the time it felt devastating!

      A Hug and a Kiss :))

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